Clementine Standington-Fulthrope

Clementine Standington-Fulthrope's court shoes

Two things you’d take to a desert island?
The complete selection of PG Wodehouse, stout walking shoes.
When did you last cry?
Don’t be so ridiculous.
Who would be your dream dinner guests?
The dog trainer Barbara Woodhouse, Albert Einstein, Red Rum, my dearly deceased husband Bertie, my three granddaughters and I’m also rather partial to that young Declan Donnelly chap. He’s got a glint in his eye.
Your favourite word?
Fiddlesticks!
The richest person on your Christmas card list?
Don’t be so vulgar.
What is the world’s greatest invention?
Am I allowed two? Extendable dog lead and the shooting stick.
If you were Prime Minister for the day, what would you outlaw?
Chewing gum and those dreadful jumpers with hoods on. I’d get rid of that smarmy little toad Peter Mandleson.
What’s in your handbag?
Well, my purse obviously, and front door keys. A raffle ticket from last Thursday’s WI meeting (I didn’t win), Errol Flynn’s treats and plastic bag to pick his mess up in, a rather peculiar fashion magazine called LOVE that my granddaughter Calypso asked me to get for her. Brenda Briggs’ housekeeping wages, a packet of tissues, one lipstick. Lily of the Valley perfume stick (I‘ve worn it since I was 16), a pair of court shoes I’ve just had re-heeled at the cobblers, literature from the county council meeting, a recipe for oatmeal cookies. Finally, a picture of my beloved Bertie, taken at our wedding in 1943. It still makes me go weak at the knees everything I look at it and that’s nothing to do with my rheumatoid arthritis.
Who would play you in the film of your life?
My granddaughters have said I bear a passing resemble to the actress Phylidda Law, but I’d like that nice Kate Winslet. The reality is that they’d probably dig up Katherine Hepburn, or someone similarly ancient.

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